Loading...
8 minutes reading time (1590 words)

Systemic Failures and Elderly Abuse: A Heartbreaking Tale of Deception and Neglect

Elderly abuse Elder abuse can be physical, psychological, sexual, social or financial. It may include mistreatment and neglect. Elder abuse is usually caused by a family member but it may also be caused by a friend or neighbour. The most common forms of elder abuse are psychological and financial.

My parents had been banking with Lloyds Bank for quite some years. They had separate bank accounts and were very routine with their expenditures. They would catch the bus from where they lived in Billinge into St. Helen's every Friday and go into the local branch of Lloyds to withdraw a regular amount of £100 from the cash machine. After that, they would go into town for a few bits of shopping and a coffee before heading home. The staff and branch manager knew my parents as they were regular customers in the branch.

During the lockdown, my parents, like most in their age group were classified as vulnerable. They followed the guidelines from the Main Stream Media (MSM) to stay at home and save lives. My poor mum was petrified of the so-called killer virus they called Covid-19, while my poor dad, bless him, was oblivious and lived in his happy place with dementia.

My mum's mental health took a significant decline as her routine was completely turned upside down. We used to go out each Saturday to get our hair done, do our weekly shopping at Sainsbury's, and finish the day with a glass of wine at the same pub. My mum really looked forward to our weekends. The toll and stress on my mum made her physically unwell, and she ended up with a chest infection, leading to a five-day hospitalisation. Luckily, she was treated with antibiotics. During her hospital stay, I wasn't allowed to visit, but my mum's oldest daughter, who was rarely in my parents' life due to her full-time job as an estate agent, was there. Being the next oldest and living five minutes from my parents' home, I was the one entrusted with keys to their property.

The younger two of my parents' adult children had severe health issues: my brother was battling throat cancer, and the younger daughter had severe mobility issues. I happily assumed the role of my parent's main support as they aged. During my mum's recovery from pneumonia, the younger disabled daughter, asked the older daughter who was on furlough for help. 

The older daughter accompanied our mum in the ambulance to the hospital while I stayed to care for my dad who had his own health issues, including dementia. I checked to see if my mum had her purse in her handbag, which she did, containing around £80 in notes and two cash cards.

My mum spent five days under NHS care at the end of June 2020. During her stay, I 'FaceTimed' the older step-sister to check on her well-being, and I noticed that my mum didn't seem well. Upon her return, while unpacking her toiletries, I checked her purse and found the two cards but no cash.

Later that evening, I inquired about the missing cash from my mum's purse, and the older daughter claimed that mum had asked her to buy a top and underwear, which she believed staff might have stolen. I advised her to show them the receipts, but instead, she insisted on returning the money to my mum's purse, which I found bizarrely strange. I decided to keep my mum's purse with me for safekeeping as her shopping was now being done online and delivered.

Over the following weeks, my mum's behavior became increasingly strange. When I was with her, she would turn nasty, pushing my hands away if I tried to comfort her or hug her. This was completely out of character for my mum, who was my best friend, and we were extremely close.

I messaged the younger daughter to inquire about my mum's well-being, and I always received the same response, claiming she was doing great but kept asking for her purse, which I found hard to believe. Despite my doubts, I gave my mum her purse.

On one occasion, my mum asked me to withdraw £200 from the cash machine to pay for cleaners and window cleaners. I was surprised by the amount, but she insisted, so I withdrew the money, kept the receipt, and gave it to her, advising her to keep it safe. However, the next day, only £50 remained in her purse. I texted the younger daughter, asking if anyone had taken money, but no one admitted to it.

In early July 2020, I acquired Lasting Powers of Attorney (LPAs) for both parents through a company called Just Wills, who advised me to register only when I believed my parents lacked capacity. Due to my mother's declining mental health, I registered the LPAs in July 2020. I contacted Lloyds Bank to express my concerns about potential fraud on my parents' accounts, and I learned that the older daughter had accompanied my mum to change her PIN, raising alarm bells. At that time, my mum was suffering from delirium, unbeknownst to me, while she was being manipulated and brainwashed.

The older daughter offered to take care of my parents while I took a few days of respite, but I had doubts about the sustainability of her help due to her selfish nature. During this supposed respite period, they arranged for a consultant to visit my parents' property and coerced my mum into making another Will & LPAs. The same was done for my dad without any capacity assessment on 17th July 2020.

On the night of 21st July 2020, my younger sister's son called to say my parents were alone and requested me to stay with them. When I arrived at my parents' home, I found it in disarray, with dishes piled high and dirty laundry scattered about. The next day, the older daughter arrived unexpectedly early at 10 am to take my mum for her hair appointment for the second time. I expressed my concerns about her restless night and the daughter's intrusive behavior in the bathroom, trying to hide what she was saying to my mum, who was deaf but could lip-read. It seemed like she was making my mum promise not to tell anyone she had signed anything. This raised further alarm bells.

Throughout the day, I cleaned up the bungalow and dealt with the laundry left for me. However, there was no sign of my mum, and my dad kept asking about her. Later, the police arrived, claiming that the older step-sister had made serious allegations against me, accusing me of threatening her with a knife and being abusive. I refuted the claims, explaining that I had been caring for my parents and cleaning up after them. This incident took place on 22nd July 2020.

I promptly visited Lloyds Bank the next day to report potential fraud on my parents' vulnerable accounts, but they were not prepared to take action, stating I didn't hold LPAs. I reminded them that the matter had nothing to do with LPAs and requested they safeguard at least one of the accounts. Nevertheless, they gave the same response and took no action.

On 3rd September 2020, I received a text from my dad's sister, informing me that my mum was in the hospital with a fractured femur. The step-daughter claimed she had LPAs, though they hadn't been regularly checked, and the staff took her word for it, believing her to be plausible.

Three days later, I received another text from my dad's sister, saying that my dad was in the hospital with a possible stroke or head injury. I approached Lloyds Bank again, informing them of my parents' hospitalisation and expressing concerns about potential activities on their accounts. It turned out that my dad's card had been used to pay a will-writing company called Accord to the sum of £3,500.

My parents spent a month under NHS care, and during that time, their property was put on the market by the step-daughter. I engaged a solicitor to protect my elderly parents from domestic and financial abuse, but during this period, I was deliberately kept away.

By December 2020, my parents' accounts had been depleted of over £60k, with most of the money used to refurbish the step-daughter's home. My attempts to raise concerns with social services and Lloyds Bank were ignored, and my parents were moved to live with the step-daughter and her husband in an annex built for them. However, they were soon abandoned, dumped back in their bungalow and left to fend for themselves, with little care and support.

I managed to get my mum to Lloyds Bank, where she discovered that all her money had disappeared. My dad's account was frozen after my mum reported the fraud and theft to the police. My mum insisted on prosecuting the step-daughter. However, the investigation was closed following a meeting with the police and social services, and my request for a review was denied.

I filed complaints with Lloyds Bank, which they did not uphold, closing the complaints and referring me to the financial ombudsman. However, the ombudsman only accepts complaints after the grant of probate, which means any resolution will be significantly delayed.

This entire ordeal has revealed shocking systemic failures by all agencies involved. My mum passed away in June 2022, and I believe it was due to a broken heart at the loss of her huspnad and soul mate, and having to fight to stop the gifting of her property and reverse the changes to her will and last wishes. My dad passed away later, just three weeks before a hearing. I've presented evidence of my dad's lack of mental capacity at the time of the LPAs to Lloyds Bank, but they have not acted upon my complaints, leaving me feeling hopeless and frustrated.

×
Stay Informed

When you subscribe to the blog, we will send you an e-mail when there are new updates on the site so you wouldn't miss them.

Letter And Response Sent To MP Barbara Keeley, Wor...
Betrayed by the NHS: Heartbreaking Story of a Moth...
 

Comments 2

Lindsey on Sunday, 23 July 2023 14:17

Banks are corrupt to the core! I have heard so many horror stories as to what they have done to people! That aside, I think it is dreadful what you sisters did to your parents. It is unforgivable I don't understand people who put money before a life or their family. Its not how you treat some one who has given you the best, most precious gift of all. LIFE!

Banks are corrupt to the core! I have heard so many horror stories as to what they have done to people! That aside, I think it is dreadful what you sisters did to your parents. It is unforgivable I don't understand people who put money before a life or their family. Its not how you treat some one who has given you the best, most precious gift of all. LIFE!
Stevie on Monday, 24 July 2023 14:03

Oh how evil! How can your mother's eldest daughter do such a terrible thing to her own mother? How could she be so greedy! I expect this from banks, social services and the hospital, yet it's most shocking from a family member. I believe something similar happened to my brother's friend. He was living with his grandmother and taking care of her, then one day found his mother had stuck his grandmother in a care home and then sold her flat. He went homeless and to this day he doesn't know where his grandmother is or if she's even alive. Your poor parents! How much you've suffered! This "failure" was no accident- this was collusion! Evil walks among us.

Oh how evil! How can your mother's eldest daughter do such a terrible thing to her own mother? How could she be so greedy! I expect this from banks, social services and the hospital, yet it's most shocking from a family member. I believe something similar happened to my brother's friend. He was living with his grandmother and taking care of her, then one day found his mother had stuck his grandmother in a care home and then sold her flat. He went homeless and to this day he doesn't know where his grandmother is or if she's even alive. Your poor parents! How much you've suffered! This "failure" was no accident- this was collusion! Evil walks among us.
Already Registered? Login Here
Tuesday, 23 July 2024